Don’t tell me your busy

If the first words out of your mouth when we meet is apologizing for how busy you are, I don’t want to hear it.

Not that I don’t know how busy you are. Not that I don’t appreciate how busy you are.

Tell me what you’ve been up to but you don’t have to equate that with being busy.

But if that is the first thing you say to me, this does not work as an apology.

It becomes your go to excuse.

Explaining how busy you are becomes your justification, a way to make yourself feel better.

It does not make you any less busy.

You will always be busy.

But it does not make you anymore likely in the future to make plans with me.

Busy becomes your get out of jail free card. Your admittance of “failure”.

It becomes a way of admitting guilt without actually trying to make it better.

And it will be your excuse a month from now, a year from now, 10 years from now.

Take busy out of your vocabulary.

Next time you say we’ll try to meet up, don’t add a “but” at the end.

Forget the “but I’m so busy” at the end. That is admitting right off the bat that you are going to fail. If those words cross your lips before you have even tried to make plans with me, you have failed before even trying.

You may feel better, but for me, I am stuck continuing to try while you have already failed.